In different stages of life it can seem like everyone has it together or knows exactly what they are doing with their lives, whether you just graduated high school and most of your peers know what career they want to get into or you are just graduating university and your friends and peers have careers lined up and they seem like they know exactly what to do and how to move forward with their lives. You might think to yourself, “I have no idea what I am doing with my life,” “Everyone else has it all figured out,” or “I should have things figured out by now.”
I often hear people saying this and feeling alone in that feeling, but what most people don't consider is that they are not alone in this; it is a normal part of life.The truth is that many people are still trying to figure themselves out at all ages, even if it doesn’t look like it from the outside. Some people may seem confident in the path they are taking, but still question if it is the right one for them. Others may change careers, go back to school, discover new interests, or realize that what they originally planned for themselves no longer fits and that's okay!
Life is rarely as linear as we think it is supposed to be.It can also be difficult not to compare yourself to the people around you, especially during times when everyone seems to be reaching milestones at different speeds. Social media can make this even harder by showing only the polished parts of people’s lives while hiding the uncertainty, stress, and self-doubt that often exists behind the screens.Not having everything figured out does not mean you are failing or falling behind. Sometimes figuring things out comes from trying things, making mistakes or changing directions. There is no single timeline that everyone is supposed to follow, and it is okay if your path looks different from someone else’s.
If you feel stuck in figuring things out, here are a few things you can do:
- Explore your values, what your core values are, and how you can use those to navigate how you would like your life to look.
- Explore new interests to figure out what you like.
- Talk to people you trust about how you are feeling.
- Give yourself grace and make sure you are practicing self-compassion.
You do not need to have your whole future planned out right now. It is okay to take things one step at a time and allow yourself space to explore who you are, what matters to you, and what kind of life you want.
